I am "blessed" to have many nights that I cannot or do not sleep all the way through. During this time, God has often encouraged me in spending my time wisely. Whether that is catching up on some needed house work or settling into the quiet with only God as my company. On this particular night, however, the children that Brian and I are working to adopt were on my mind. I often have people look at me in disbelief when I tell them that it is hard to have "my" children out there, but not with me. Some question the attachment because we haven't spent time with them or gotten to know them face to face. Others believe that if you focus on "something" else, it won't be as hard on you.
I understand. They don't have a clue. They are speaking from full arms with noise-filled homes. They are trying to encourage and for that I thank them. However, on this night, God would not let me sleep without writing the words that He was providing, so that maybe some might catch a glimpse into the heart of a waiting mother.
My children are out there
How much more can I take
Not knowing exactly where
A home I must quickly make
Ready and waiting
For them to come in
Loving and caring
Each one our new kin
For these very children I pray
O, how my heart yearns
To hold them in my arms one day
The tears my eyes do burn
My children are out there
Not of flesh and bone
Those my body could not bear
God will make my own
Hoping and praying
God sends others their way
Helping and fitting
For their new home always
Calls of mommy and daddy
Are still waiting to be heard
Everything now is ready
This silence feels absurd
My children are out there
O, God, hear my plea
In the world no matter where
Please bring them home to me
Written by Erin Kingston on September 18, 2014 at
1:37 a.m. from 760 Hwy 365 as I wait for my precious 5 to come home to me!
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